Since I just turned 26 about three weeks ago, I would like to share what I have experience living for 26 years in this beautiful yet complicated world that we are living in. While I was writing this blog, I have also come to realized a ton of things about myself, what I have accomplished, and what I have learned in life. This blog is all about my journey that I am proud to share to you all.

10 QUICK FUN FACTS ABOUT ME

1. I moved to Hong Kong when I was 13 years old

2.  I was a working student during college 

3.  I am obsessed with vinegar

4. I did bungy jumping at Macau Tower in year 2013

5. My favorite season is Autumn

6.  I am terrified of spiders and centipedes 

7.  My tolerance for Alcohol intake is pretty high and my favorite liquor is Tequila

8.  I have a unique Chinese name

9.  I do not eat pork for almost a year now (I stopped since March 2016)

10. I like to suck the egg yolk (that's how I eat my egg)

MY CHILDHOOD MEMORIES

I had a happy childhood life back then. I would find absolutely anything, and everything fun and I am always looking for something to be excited. Considering that I was the youngest in the family and the age gap between my siblings and I are quite far, but I was never bored. It is what I would always want to go back to if I were to be given a once in a lifetime chance to go back. I was a curious child, and I would always look for something to do to amuse myself.

Childhood, for me, was very carefree. I am free from all the problems. But even as a child, I have witnessed quite a lot of things and some of it I had to deal with it by myself. I have seen some sad moments, such as witnessing my two brothers fighting. I witnessed my pets dying, who meant the world to me during those times. I have experienced loss in competitions in which I hate losing. I have to deal with jealousy as a child caused by some family members. Lastly, when my grandfather's died from his illness. It is the saddest and painful moment that I have encountered as a child. 

A few weeks before my beloved grandpa died, I visited him in his home together with my mom, and upon arrival, he asked me to come over to his favourite couch. He wasn't saying anything to me, but I felt the connection while he was looking at my eyes while holding my tiny hands. It seems like he is saying goodbye to me. Then, a few days later, he passed away. It took me a while to finally sink the unfortunate news in my mind that he is gone. On his cremation day, that was the first and last time I saw his face inside the coffin since he passed away and tears automatically dripped down my cheeks. It was a traumatising experience. I was only nine years old when that happens. I will forever miss him dearly. 

DEALING WITH PUBERTY

Puberty for me was a mix-emotion, and I was sensitive, just the same as what any other teenagers had to face during adolescence. Some of you might even relate to my story. My mood was very complicated, sometimes I am happy, and sometimes I am suddenly sad for no reason. My monthly period used to be so painful and unbearable. There were even times where I would cry and pray to God to take my pain away.

Puberty was never easy to deal with in the first place. You are not only dealing with the physical changes but as well as emotions that are quite hard to control and to fully understand it. I did have a lot of emotional and physical problems that have both led me to become paranoid, dramatic, sensitive and insecure about myself. I used to take all my hurdles as if like it is the end of the world. Although my problem during those times was just a teeny tiny one, I still became dramatic at some point. I used to take every word from everyone very seriously. When people do not do what they say they would or when they lie to me, I became agitated, and there were times that I would not even speak to that person for a while. When I was 13 years old, I started having pimples all over my forehead. I used to hate it, and I ridiculously tries to pluck it off (I know most people used to do this as well). The pimples made me feel insecure, and I wanted to get rid of it so badly. It was understandable that as a young child, it was tough to control our feelings towards the changes that have been happening. For me, It felt like I was trap inside a bomb that wanted to explode so severely.

How I have dealt with puberty is simply by going with it. Life goes on. My mother used to advise me to be patient and not to think about it too much as it is very typical for every teenager to go through that phase, and soon the sufferings will be over. Well, she was, indeed, right. As soon as I reached the final stage, I started feeling good about myself, and I became immune to it. I became a brand new person who had gained some confidence and faith in myself.

MY FAMILY

I belong to a big family tree (on my mother's side). In my family, I have three siblings, and I am the youngest. As you know, being the youngest was never an easy thing. I got most of the attention, and one simple mistake could be a big deal already. Most of the youngest in the family is known for being the "Rebel" or the 'Black Sheep" in the family. I can say that I am quite of a rebel at some point in my life. My family were quite strict with me. I was not allowed to have any boyfriends, I have curfews, and I never had any sleepover till I was 19 years old (If it were not because it was a school excursion then my parents would not agree to let me go).

Well, I secretly had boyfriends, and eventually, I learned to lie. I am not proud of what I did, nor was I ashamed of it. I have learned a lot while rebelling, and the things that I had been through made me become a better person. Well, at least I got some moral lessons to share with my future children and grandchildren one day. It is always good to tell a story, to teach and to understand people when you have experienced it yourself because it sounds more realistic. 

Anyways, back to my family. My mother's side surname is "So". I have two uncles, three aunts with 15 cousins. Most of my cousins are married and with kids already. When we have our family gathering, our family tree looks huge. 

My grandparents were my idols and were the perfect role models. I know they were not a perfect person, and they had made mistakes just like every human being. But what I admired about them the most were the qualities that they had in them. My grandpa came from a poor family, and while my grandma was born in a wealthy family. When they got married, my grandma's father did not support their marriage, and that led my grandma to suffer. But my grandpa was a hardworking man, and he had worked many jobs to support his big family, until one day, his sacrifices have paid off as he became rich. It was his hard work that motivates me that I can also be what my grandpa had grown as long as I work hard. My grandparents are both loving, generous and understanding. It has been years since they passed away, but they will always have a special place in my heart, and I will always share their story because I am super proud of them.

DEALING WITH FRIENDS & BROKEN FRIENDSHIPS

I do not have a lot of friends. I used to have a bunch of people who I thought were real people and to whom I thought were my rock. Unfortunately, things had changed, and so does people. It is true "Friends come and go" It is not necessary that it is my fault or their fault on why the friendship had faded. It is just how it is. We had a mutual understanding that we are all different and that we are not going in the same directions. However, I am still thankful to the people I was friends with in the past, as I have also learned something from each of them and of course for the memories they had given me (good & bad). 

How I deal with a broken friendship is quite practical, but back in high school, I used to cry a lot whenever a friendship fades. It was frustrating for me as I know that I was a good and a loyal friend, but things did not go well, and something is not right. So I eventually learned not to push myself too much when I know it is not going to change anything, maybe it will only change for the worst. I go with the flow. It sucks to lose a friendship bond, but we all know for sure that we will gain a new friend at the right time. 

To the friends that are still with me until now, I would like to say thank you for keeping up with me all this time and for the love you all have been showing me. I truly appreciate it.

DEALING WITH HEARTBREAKS

I think I have dealt with heartbreaks for about three times in my 26 years. I had experienced a different kind of pain and learned many different types of lessons in all three heartbreaks. I am not going to throw anybody's name here. The truth is I am not friends with any of my ex-boyfriends, and I do not want to deal with anyone or anything from the past. Once a relationship is over, it is forever gone and buried. I prefer to leave it behind and focus on the present and future. 

In every heartbreak that I had experienced were all painful (duh!). I believe that I was a good partner, but I guess being good was not enough to keep a man by my side. I was told by one of my ex-boyfriends that I was too kind and that I deserve someone better. Well, that is complete bullshit! Think about it, if you had a good girlfriend, why on earth would you let her go? I used to be so angry and so frustrated. I am let down big time and which have led me to alcohol. Alcohol was my best pal, and I used to think that getting drunk probably is what will soothe the pain away, but I was wrong. It took me a while to finally realise that I am the only one who can help myself by being strong and always to think positively. Thanks to them for hurting me, so I learned not to trust people that easily. Thanks to them for letting me go so that I can find a better man that knows how to treat a lady well. Thanks to them for fooling me, so I became wiser and to think twice about all the decisions that I will make. All I can say is that I am what I am because of all the things that I had been through and learned.

Well, it took me 22 years to finally meet the man and the answers to my wishes. I have been dating this awesome man called Ryan for about four years now. He may not be the perfect man, but I know he is the right one for me. He has a great sense of humour, and he has never failed to make me laugh. I have never felt this much love and positive vibes from anybody before. Ryan and I had been friends for quite some time before we became a couple, and It is funny how we even got together in the first place. We both felt that there was a connection between us, and he is not only my boyfriend, but he eventually became my best friend as well. We share almost everything, and we compromise each other equally. This has been my best relationship, and I am looking forward to spending my time within the coming many more years with him.

DEALING WITH THE ADULT WORLD

I am 26 years old, it is pretty clear that I have reached the adult world, but the question is how much have I dealt with the real world, which they call it "the hardest road"?  

Who says living in the adult world was easy? Only small innocent kids will say that because I wished to be an adult faster when I was only 13 years old, so I am free to do what I want. It is true that as an adult, you have more freedom to do what you want compared to being a kid that always need to follow your parents. But was being an adult easy, though? Well, it is not, sure you got the freedom but to become an adult and to live up to the real world's standard is a never-ending challenge. 

Since I was 19 years old, I have worked in three different industries (two retail stores, one bar, one fine dining restaurant and three teaching jobs) and I earned a degree in Fashion Marketing. What I had studied in college has no connection with my current position as a teacher right now. I chose this career path simply because teaching opens their doors for me and marketing did not due to my zero experience in the marketing field, and as usual this is the real world that I am dealing. 

Let me share you about what I had experience with criticism from people, well mostly the people who do not know me. I was criticized by my race, some language barriers. I was treated differently by not being able to speak in Cantonese, which is I am not from Hong Kong by the way and my fragile look, I seem to look weak to some of them. The criticism was not easy to take in at the beginning. There were days that I feel like giving up. So how did I end up dealing with criticism? The answer is simple, and i keep going and continue to do the best that I can. The pressure is always there because being an adult is hard, and the expectations of people and to yourself as well are still going to be overwhelming. But I know that my time will come, my time to call myself and to prove to people that they are wrong to belittle me will happen one day as soon as I am ready. I will continue to work hard and to take every minute to learn something new. Everyone starts from nothing to something. 

Just like what they said, "The struggle is real". But so what? If struggling can make you wiser and stronger, then why not? I would take this as an opportunity to learn and to become a better person.

MY BIGGEST CHALLENGES YET SO FAR

I can name three things that I would consider the most significant challenges in life so far.  

1. LIFE AS A WORKING STUDENT

It was my own choice to become a working student. I wanted to finish my studies, and it was unfortunate that my parents cannot afford my tuition fees. So I decided to take up a loan for my college fees. I had worked full-time jobs while studying. It is very tough, and my schedule was very hectic, but I wanted to finish my studies and earn myself a degree. 

It was not an easy road, and I was caught up with both school and work at the same. It is probably the biggest challenge I had ever face in my life, but all these hardships paid off as I finally graduated and got my degree! It is one of my biggest achievements, considering that I am supporting myself financially. 

I have created a blog about my life as a working student previously. You may check out the link of my blog if you fancy it.

Link - http://www.michellesochan.com/blogs/2015/11/6/life-as-a-working-student

2. HUMILIATION FROM PAST RELATIONSHIPS

I had experienced tons of humiliation from past relationships. This topic is quite sensitive, but I am not ashamed to share this either way. Breaking up was not the most painful part for me, but it is the aftermath of the breakups. The lies, tricks and rumours were the ones that gave me a hard time to move on with my life. 

I hate being lied on every final break up that I had, I always asked for the truth, but I guess those boys whom I used to date were too coward to tell me the truth but as always "the truth will always come out". I felt stupid for believing the lies and for trusting the wrong people. What is worst is that the people who I thought were on my side seems to know the whole truth before me, and no one says a word about it. That is when I started to feel like I got betrayed. 

My escape and solutions during these challenging times were alcohol and partying. I even came to that moment when I became an alcoholic, almost every day I am out drinking. Until one day, I realized this is not how I should treat myself, and I should not ruin my life before it is too late. It took a while before I can stand up on my own again and gain my confidence back. 

Humiliation was never an easy thing to handle. I honestly think that if I were not that strong enough, I would have eventually ruined my life until its unfixable.

3.  OVERCOMING FEAR OF FALLING

I used to hate rides in the amusement park because I hate having my heart beat so fast and the adrenaline was overpowering. It is something that scares me. But do not get me wrong, I love adventures, but I just never dared to do it, not until my boyfriend Ryan persuaded me to let go of this fear. 

On our first anniversary back in September 2013, he had suggested us to go to Macau to celebrate our anniversary and to also do the bungee jump at the Macau Tower. We made a deal that I should do it now or never. I was petrified and even thought of backing out from our agreement, but then I do not want to go back to Hong Kong, knowing that people would tease me for not doing it. It is a bit of pressure, but honestly, I did the jump for myself, to conquer my fear of falling and experience this once in a lifetime opportunity.

The waiting time did not bother me that much as I was a bit calm. But it is when I was on the platform and while I was strolling to get to the edge. I regret looking down because that had made me want to shit myself. There are so many things going through my mind, but I let go, and I did it! Finally, I know the feeling of falling off from a Tower (61 floors to be precise). This adventure was by far my best adventure and something I am proud of sharing.  

MY PERSONALITY

Every person has a different personality, and everyone has their qualities that are good and bad.   

In my opinion, my personality is unique as I have qualities that only a few people know, and some of it may not even reflect on how I look.

So here are my personality, I am...

1. "Passionate about almost everything that I do."

When I do something, I always put passion and my heart into it. Even if I am doing something, I do not like at the beginning, but I will always find a way to be passionate about it. Let me put it this way, once I started something I will always find a way to be happy about it.

2. "Caring & understanding are my weaknesses."

Being caring and quick to understand people in any situations are considered as blessings. But the downside on this is that I care too much, sometimes I care even more than the person who is facing the obstacles itself. I care too much that I get disappointed in the end, now that is the problem about me, I care too much.

3. "I am adventurous & a travel junkie."

I may physically look fragile but trust me; I am a lot stronger than I seem. I love adventures, and I am up for it whenever I have a chance to do it. I am up for everything with an adrenaline rush, travels, climbing mountains, bungy jumping, sports and many more. Well, I am up for anything except for jumping a cliff. I do not know how to float, and I panicked when I do not have any life support. I believe that one day, I will overcome that fear. I love travelling and seeing new places, and my dream is to visit every place in the whole world.

4. "I remember everything." 

I have an excellent memory, and I remember most of the things that happened around me. When I say by everything, I mean everything, including what you say to me. 

5. "I am very stubborn."

My mom would agree with this very well. I may look like a sweet innocent and obedient girl, but as much as possible, I do everything my way. It is not perfect if I do not do it my way. But of course, if it is teamwork, then it is entirely different. I would know the difference. 

6. "I am a freak when it comes to being organized."

I have this disease of making everything around me organized even a simple thing. I prefer it all planned out and see it organized. I know it sounds crazy but trusts me, I feel good being organized and I hate missing out anything. 

7.  "I have a very dry sarcasm."

I laugh at jokes pretty quickly, but the problem is when I make jokes or when I try to be sarcastic, I sound like I am serious, complaining or angry. It is simple, and it is called dry sarcasm. 

8.  "My patient is high."

Every single day my patient is being tested. Special people surround me for some reason. Since I am a teacher, I would need to have a lot of patience, which is understandable. But there were days that I need to deal with people who are either dumb, clueless or selfish. I owe this to those people because my patience has gone to a completely different level because of them by overcoming them and not to stoop on their level.

9.  "I do not quit, and I do not give up easily."

When I want something, I do not just sit there and wait for it to happen. Even if it is quite impossible, I will not give up without giving it a try and a fight. I am not a quitter, and I make sure that I will do everything I can.

10. "I forgive, but I do not forget." 

It is simple, do not do anything terrible or I shall not forget it. Forgiving a person may seem to be a good vibe, but I always remind myself not to forget what the person did to me because I believe it is part of the lesson that I should never forget. Plus it is always good to be careful with sneaky people.

LIKES AND DISLIKES

Everyone has their different likes and dislikes about things, people, scenarios and feelings. I would start with my "likes"  first.

I like gatherings, it excites me, and honestly, I enjoy meeting new people. I like having deep conversations, mostly about life and some theories. I fancy people who are responsible, respectful, considerate and truthful. I love travelling, and I hope to see the whole world before I am gone. I like kids or teenagers who have manners and know how to behave themselves, especially in public. I love watching movies repeatedly as if like I never get tired of it. Lastly, I like keeping a planner as It helps me organize myself.

I dislike people that lie, primarily when they lie on my face when I already know the truth. I hate waiting for more than 15 minutes, especially when I am in a hurry. I get frustrated when a person does not pick up my calls, although I can be more patience with late text replies but not phone calls. I dislike people who use someone to get what they want and does not feel any remorse for doing it. I get turned off on cancelled plans, especially when it is by purposely. I hate surprises, I do not like to have an awkward moment, and everyone will stare at me. I hate cheaters, why not just break up and then find a new companion, why cheat? I do not fancy irresponsible people, especially when they have to be responsible. Lastly, I hate being unproductive, and I believe that a day should not be wasted doing nothing at all.

I am not going to be surprised if a person judges me before getting to know my story. I know that most people judge me base on how I look. Well, that is quite normal, but people should stop this habit and start to get to know the person first then be the judge later.

MY FOOD PREFERENCES

FAVOURITE DISHES

Cha Misua (Fukien noodles), Spaghetti (Italian style), Risotto with lots of Mushrooms, Steak Tartare (All time favourite!), Sinigang with Bangus (Filipino soup dish with Milkfish), Hot & Sour Soup (Shanghai style), Sunny Side Up Egg (I like the yolk to be perfect), Beef Taco (with lots of Guacamole), Morning Glory Vegetables (Thailand style), Fresh Oysters (I can take as many as possible if I could), Steamed Momo (Nepalese dumplings), Salmon Sashimi (Japanese style), Lamb Biryani (Indian dish), Rib Eye Steak (Medium Rare) and Clams in Oyster Sauce (Chinese style) are my favourite food.

VEGETABLES

I like all kinds of vegetables. I will name some of my most favourites. I like Carrots, Bitter Melon, Zucchini, Green Beans, Corn, Cabbage, Eggplant, Okra, Onion, Garlic, Potato and Radish.

MEAT

I like eating Beef, Lamb and Chicken. I strictly don't eat Pork, I have been Pork-free for ten months now. 

SEAFOOD

I am not much of a seafood person, but I do like several kinds of seafood. I like Oyster, Milk Fish, Small Clams, Salmon, Tuna and Shrimp/ Prawn (I will eat it as long as the skin are peeled off. Yes I am that lazy haha).

SOUP

I like all kinds of soup. I would feel super happy if there's soup in every meal regardless of what it is.  

DESSERT

I am not much of a sweet tooth. I only like a few desserts such as Chocolates, Avocado & Green Tea Ice Cream, Red Velvet Cupcake, Simple Cake and Leche Flan.

FRUITS

I like Banana, Apple, Green Grapes, Grapefruit, Tomato, Strawberry and Blueberries

SPICES

I like Vinegar (like a lot and I'm crazy about it). I also like Spicy and Gravy flavours.  

OTHERS

I like all kinds of Mushrooms and Black & White Truffles.

FOOD RESTRICTION

*STRICTLY NO PORK*

Why? It all started with this video of a piglet dancing to Rihanna's song "Work". Here is the youtube link, if you're curious of what the video might be.

Link of the dancing piglet - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X3QSfUk8Z6U

After watching this video, I fell in love with pigs, and I even considered to get a micro pig as my pet. Unfortunately, it is not possible as it is illegal to keep pigs as a pet in Hong Kong. Pigs are only legal for livestock (Booooo!). But anyway, I researched pigs and how intelligent they are, smarter than dogs. My research has gone deeper to how pigs are being slaughtered and the consequences of eating pork as well. Until one day, I woke up and decided to STOP eating pork. I am still hoping that one day, I will be able to keep a pig as a pet. One day!

MY ALCOHOL & NON-ALCOHOL DRINK PREFERENCES

Well let me start with my non-alcohol drink preferences first shall we? My favourite non-alcoholic drinks are:

Tea: Green Tea, Chinese Tea and Jasmine Tea (I am a tea lady), Ice Milk Tea (Hong Kong style) 

Juice: Apple Juice, Cranberry Juice, Bitter Melon Juice

Shake: Avocado Shake

And of course, Water H20 :)

My favourite alcoholic drinks are:

Beer: My top 3 favourites - Corona, Tiger and Hoe-garden

Cocktail: Mai Tai (I will know if a bartender makes a legit Mai Tai or not) and Kamikazee 

Liquor: Jose Cuervo Tequila Gold, Tequila Rose, Patron XO Cafe, Myers Rum and 

Wine: Gavi di Gavi, Tenuta Delle Terre Nere Etna Blanco 2012, Paco Garcia Rioja

I REACH NUMERO 26

So how does it feel to be 26 now? Honestly, It has not synchronized in my mind yet. Does age matter on how you should be and what you should have achieved? In my opinion, It all should depend on experiences, how much you have encounter and learn in life. For 26 years, I would say I have gone through many hardships, learned and gain a lot of experiences, but I also know that there are still more challenges to face and new skills to gain. Life is full of surprises and non-stop adventures. As for physical appearance, well, I can tell you honestly that I do not look like I am 26 years old. I look a lot younger. What can I say, I got the Asian genes HA! 

WHAT AM I LOOKING FORWARD TO NEXT?

I am looking forward to what has yet to come. I will accept any challenges, where I can have the opportunity to learn, to fully utilize my strength and to achieve something. I believe that 2017 will be a good year for me. It is all about trusting your instincts, and if you genuinely believe that your year will be a good one, then it definitely will be. If I happen to make any mistake, I will be more than willing to learn from it. 

I hope that you all find my real life story amusing and that somehow you might learn something from it. I will be writing my next life journey when I turned 27 years old in December 2017 😊

Yours Truly, 

Michelle Chan